I have mucho mucho to blog about....and it will all come very soon. Here lately, I have been at such peace about everything and am finally getting settled enough now that I can finally start blogging the way I used to!
Due to housing/moving/school, I am staying with grandmother who lives about 45 minutes away from base so that I can get Anistyn to school (yes...thats about 2 blogs right there....). With no driving state to state, people to entertain, no TV (gasp...its great!) and finally a LOT of down time...I did something the other day that I had been wanting to do for a long time. I hadn't had the time lately...what a dumb excuse. I read the bible.
There have been many things over the last few months that have just put me in different "funks" as I call them. Not having Josh around. Wanting to find a job. Wanting to find a house. Waiting. Hurrying up...and then waiting. Getting bad news after bad news. Josh having to stay in TX longer. Just a list of things...
So when I picked up the bible I said to myself (and God..) 'I'm just going to open it up. I hope whatever I start reading is something that will just hit me.'
I flipped it open and there sat the book of Job. What a story. I've read it before...but I REALLY read it this time.
Here's a guy who has everything he could want. Animals, children, happiness, money...and who does he thank for it? God. Always thankful to God. Its easy to be thankful to Him when things are great though, isn't it? So...Satan comes along and mentions this to God. So He "tests" Job. He takes away his children, his animals...everything he loves so dearly. But Job STILL is thankful and loving to God. So when that doesn't do the trick...he becomes sick. Sores all over him. There is Job...in severe pain. His children have died. All of his animals are gone. But he DOESN'T curse God. Even his wife asks him..."Why haven't you cursed Him yet?" Look at all of these terrible things that have happened? Surely God wouldn't let these things happen if he really loved someone, right? But Job refused to curse God. Because who was Job..a mere man, to question what God's motives or plans are? Then at the end...because he didn't turn away from God...he ends up with TWICE as much as he had before.
That made me think. With this military life I am slowly adapting to, a lot of things don't go my way. Heck, in LIFE things don't always go my way. There are things I don't understand. Different things in my life that have happened...and I just don't know why they had to happen that way. But you know what...I'm not the one with the answers. Someone always has it worse than you anyways. But never....never...will I blame God. There IS a reason for everything...we as humans sometimes think we need all the answers. Only He can know though.
I do give thanks to Him when things are going great. Its important though that when things aren't going the way I want them to...or terrible things happen that I just don't understand..that I continue to praise Him. Because only He knows the outcome of it all.
So what do I do? I put all my trust and faith in Him. I "give it to God." It gives me peace to know that He knows why everything happens. Maybe he testing me. If it IS him testing me...I plan to do my very best to pass.